Friday 1 March 2013

What we are left with...

I remember, some 6 years ago, while introducing myself to a new group, I shared this: "I am grateful and content". It was a very moving moment for me. Life was not looking very good but there was a deeper understanding that all is well and I am being supported and guided. Looking back to that moment and where I am now, I should say, life has taken several miraculous turns... but have I been in gratitude and contentment all through these years? I ask myself. Of course, the answer is "yes" and "no"!


So what makes this contentment so nebulous? Such a fragile, moving target?

Patanjali refers to Santosa - to be deeply anchored in a space of peace and happiness - as one of the Niyama: personal observances. With Niyama, the reference point is within you, nothing to do with external circumstances. But in all aspects of our life, our reference is externalized and relative, defined based on how we perceive (or are perceived) as better than or worse than others. How do I respond to situations when I receive less that what I think I deserve? How do I react when somebody criticises me when I am expecting them to appreciate?

Patanjali says when established in Santo., one gains the highest level of unparalleled happiness:
"Santosat Anuttamah Sukha Labhah" (YS 2.42)

We all know that the secret formula for happiness is not about acquiring more and more but our attitude towards what we have or don't have. How much we are at peace with our present reality as we perceive it. This "knowing" does not help much does it?


The way to Contentment

In order to understand happiness and contentment, we need to understand the nature of discontent, in whatever area of life it might be manifesting in a given moment. When we look deeply into the nature of discontent, we realise that it is being constantly fed by either our past experience (of what we had and don't have now) or future desire (what we don't have now but want to have it) and invariably supported by comparison with the external reality- other people.
By understanding how discontent manifests right now and dealing with it then and there, we can become empowered to clear this block and achieve peace and contentment quite simply and effortlessly. The process is rather straightforward, requiring only your body and breath and a curious, engaging mind.

How is it manifesting? What is its impact?

When I bring conscious attention to the feeling of discontent. I want to also know how is it impacting my life now
I begin to observe the thoughts, feelings, behaviours, judgements, intentions, my choices in life, how I treat others...
Isee the feeling playing out in every aspect of my life.
Isee that I have actually created a complex web of patterns that are feeding this discontent constantly.

My body and breath

I now sense it in my body, my breath is disturbed...
Body and breath offers the gateway to understanding this block and its pervasive effect on the system. The stronger the sensation, more powerful is the block.

Willingness to let go

Is the discomfort strong enough for me to want to get out of it? Am I desperate enough?
Am I ready to let go of the attachment to the discontent, to the idea that what is, is not OK?
Can I drop the thoughts NOW? Can I step back from the issue?

Stepping back, breathing out.

Can I breathe in & out... keeping the focus on the exhalation and exhaling through the strong body sensations?
Am I able to drop all the thoughts as they arise using my breath to remind me to simply clear the mind?

Clearing the space within

Am I able to experience some relief? Some space?
Is my breath getting deeper?
Is my body feeling more comfortable?

Anchoring with peace

In this moment, am I able to experience peace? Can I locate myself there, using my breath to anchor myself?
How does it feel right now? With this little experience of peace?
The peace of letting go of all the past and future and ideas of happiness?
What am I left with?
Santosa! Unlimited happiness.


"Love is what is left when you let go of all the things you love"
- (anonymous)

May you experience the highest happiness right now!

Best wishes,


Saras